Readers, meet the 2nd best dog in the world:
This poor little thing has been keeping vigil at his dead owner’s grave site in Brazil for the past two days. You guys, can you hear my heart shattering like a window that’s been hit with a baseball made of preciousness?!
I need to find this dog, wrap him ever so gently in the fluffiest receiving blanket I can find, let him suckle at my teet, gently burp him, change and powder his bottom, dress him in a puppy tuxedo, and name him Pablo.
Upon our return to the United States, I would throw a dinner party in Pablo’s honor where the wine would go straight to my head. I would spot him away from the party, alone, in the kitchen eating a pig in a blanket and looking uncomfortable from all of the attention he is receiving. Although I can feel the flush in my cheeks, I would try to compose myself before tipsily stumbling over to him and asking him, the slur in my speech only slightly detectable, if he’s having a good time. He swallows his little piggy and dabs the corners of his mouth with a napkin before taking a sip of red wine. At this moment, even though I know it is wrong, I would not be able to resist the overwhelming urge to kiss him. Things would then get extremely awkward as he explains to me in his thick Brazilian accent that he appreciates everything I have done for him, but he just can’t cross that line with me. Embarrassed, I slap him across the face and instantly burst into tears as he quickly wraps me in his puppy arms.
After a few moments of holding me closely in his puppy embrace he would force me to look up at him.
With his furry puppy paw on my lips he would hush my sobs, shhhhhhh. He whispers “Gracias, Senora, for saving my life, but I must return to my Master’s grave site”.
He leaves in the dead of night. As I hear the door close I open my eyes and see the single red rose Pablo has left at my bedside, the only proof I have that he was ever real.
OH PABLO!!!!!!!!!!! PABLO!!!!! FORGIVE ME!
**I don’t know why my arms and legs would be bleeding except maybe its from the shards of glass I cut myself with after Pablo rejected me.
- dontmakethatface posted this